And Then I Don't Feel So Bad

A few of my favorite things or things that give me warm fuzzies or things that make me feel soft and mushy inside or things that touch me, inspire me, comfort me, make my heart beat faster or things I’m thankful for. This list is random, off the top of my head, not including people and in no specific order:

The Psalms: definitely my favorite book of the Bible

Singing: especially at church and with my family but also in the car, in the shower, quietly at my desk and basically everywhere I live and breathe

Realizing that God has answered yet another prayer, even if it’s in a different way than I expected, and proved Himself faithful to me once again

Tea: Drinking hot tea was something I did whenever I went to my Grandma’s house. My Grandpa drank it with sugar and milk and so did I. I’ve since discovered loose leaf tea and I think it has a smoother taste. I prefer Earl Grey but I also like English Breakfast and Mint. Sometimes with cream and sometimes without but no more sugar.

Teapots, Tea cups and all beautiful china – I pick up mismatched pieces at yard sales and thrift stores so I can enjoy several patterns

All tea accessories, spoons, doilies, tea cozies, sugar cubes, books, china, etc.

Coffee is also enjoyable!

Donuts: especially chocolate covered custard filled (these keep me soft and mushy in more ways than one. I would like to eliminate my love for them.)

Really any baked good: cookies, muffins, scones, cake, pie, bagels etc. (again with the soft and mushy DANGIT!)

Sitting in Panera Bread Restaurant with soup in a bread bowl or a Cinnamon Crunch Bagel while reading the paper.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer TV series

Kisses from my husband and walks and snuggling, talking, laughing, dating, loving, being married to my best friend

Hugs from friends and family

Scrapbooking! It is a great creative, artistic release. I find it very therapeutic. It also helps me preserve my family’s history for future generations.

Thoughtful greeting cards & gifts: giving and receiving

My mom’s home cooking

All the movies, books and musicians that are listed on my profile page

Free time, couch time, alone time, TV time, sleep time

Snow days!!

Bed & Breakfasts: I can’t wait to stay at this one next month for our mini vacation!

Libraries and book stores

Going out to eat

Blogging & reading others

This list is certainly not exhaustive but it's all for now....

Not Yet

From My Cup Overflows … with the comfort of God’s Love by Emilie Barnes, a wonderful book of devotions that God is using to speak to me and bless me:

When God is taking so long to answer my prayers, when I’m ready for results and the only answer I seem to get is “Not yet”:

I hope I can remember to trust … because God knows the end from the beginning.

I hope I can remember to keep on forgiving and asking forgiveness, even when I don’t feel like doing it … because forgiveness is one of God’s most useful tools for changing lives.

I hope I remember to thank him today for what will happen tomorrow … because thankfulness keeps my heart hopeful and open to receiving his blessings.

When my cup is overflowing with trouble and God doesn’t seem to be doing anything, I hope I can remember that sometimes the waiting (and the growing) is exactly what I need the most.

Psalm 13
1 How long, O LORD ? Will you forget me forever?
How long will you hide your face from me?
2 How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
and every day have sorrow in my heart?
How long will my enemy triumph over me?

3 Look on me and answer, O LORD my God.
Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death;

4 my enemy will say, "I have overcome him,"
and my foes will rejoice when I fall.

5 But I trust in your unfailing love;
my heart rejoices in your salvation.

6 I will sing to the LORD,
for he has been good to me.

Penny for Your Thoughts

Wow! It’s been a long time. I don’t know if I’ll ever be very consistent in posting blogs. I’m not a very disciplined person. I do however blog in my head on a regular basis. These days all of my thoughts and experiences tend to go through the blog filter in my brain. I pay attention to details I wouldn’t have pre-blog. I analyze and reanalyze. I experiment with different ways to get my point across and edit it accordingly. Most of these mental blogs never make it to print obviously but I think it’s been beneficial for me to think them out.

Sometimes I wish I could just plug my brain in to the computer and transfer my thoughts. Can you imagine if such technology existed? I’m sure it’s quite impossible but let’s pretend it is a possibility. There would be potential for great good and great evil. Wouldn’t it be interesting to see what goes through the mind of babies? Then again, I’m sure teenager’s brains would be something to behold. Really any person of any age would be a fascinating subject. Imagine if you could explore your subconscious thoughts and have them in the writing. Mental health care would be a completely different ball game as would the criminal justice system. Torturing people for information would be a thing of the past so, Jack Bauer wouldn’t know what to do with himself . I’ve always wonders what goes through the head of the mentally challenged and those born with special needs. What goes through the minds of artists, musicians, rocket scientists, serial killers, addicts, athletes and moms? In what ways do people around the world think differently or alike? Could we learn to interpret the mindspeak of animals? How much do animals think, feel and communicate?

Of course the negative aspects may outweigh the positive ones. To have our thoughts exposed and vulnerable to judgment could be very damaging and even dangerous. There would be a serious potential for loss of privacy. Our darkest thoughts could be brought to light. Could we be prosecuted for threatening thoughts? What if companies started using this technology to “interview” potential employees or evaluate their current staff? We’ve all stuck our foot in our mouths or said things we wish we could take back. Thoughts can be wild, unruly, false and downright sinful. Retraining your thought process takes work and discipline. Yet despite my hard work in this area of my life, to replace false negative thinking with true positive thinking, I still have times when it feels like my thoughts are having me instead of me having my thoughts.

Of course when it comes down to it, there is someone who knows every thought that runs through our head. He knows them before we think them!! Despite knowing the depths of our wretchedness He loves us so much that He would leave His throne in heaven and come down to live as man. Despite the fact that He has never had so much as one sinful thought He was beaten, tortured, spit upon and murdered to pay for every sinful thought and sinful act of every person ever created. More unbearable than the physical pain was the wrath poured out from God the father for those sins and the separation Jesus felt from God the father at that time. I don’t need advanced technology to know that the weight of my sins alone must have been terrible. Of course He didn’t stay dead and defeated for long. If not for the resurrection of Christ there would be no forgiveness of sins.

Father, Thank You for hearing every horrible thought of every living being, yet loving us still. It is incomprehensible how truly amazing, powerful and loving you are. Thank You for the blood of Jesus which covers us and allows us to stand blameless before Your Holiness. Thank You God for Your incredible gift of grace and the mercy and compassion you have for sinners. Thank You for making a way for us to have a relationship with You and live with You in heaven for eternity. You have saved me and redeemed my life from the pit. I love you so much! Amen